It may seem inconsequential, but you know, it is important on what you say, to someone who is old. Doesn’t matter who is doing the talking either, whether it is me, David, or some home worker, it matters on what you say, and how. Simple innocuous stories can lead to complications.
Example, this mornings home worker, talked about how two of her ladies, in their nineties, moved from a plush retirement home, to a government run nursing home, as their money had run out, to pay for the private facility.
The issue though, is she said that the one lady, hadn’t been informed by her son, as to the move. And now, not even an hour later, I am being bombarded with, would I do that to Mom, and if I do want to put her in a home, I need to tell her.
I HAVE NO INTENTION OF PUTTING HER IN A HOME, I JUST COULDN’T DO THAT.
And yet now, thanks to those remarks, she is going to be thinking of it, of wondering if I would do that to her. She should KNOW I wouldn’t, but at her age, she does imagine worst case scenarios.
YES, conversation is important between workers and patients, BUT (and that is a big but) it needs to be carefully thought out. You can’t bring up such things, that are too similar, such as an old lady being put into a home, by her son, when the person you are talking to, has a son looking after her. You NEED to know, it will weigh on her mind, lead to questions, to unreasonable fears.
It is why I harp so much on real training, for those being sent into People’s homes. I mean it seems harmless, but the truth is, the ramification of indiscriminate conversation can lead to not just a few awkward minutes, but weeks of worry. I am STILL dealing with the comments made by VIHA & BEACON REPS from a meeting back in September 2009. Now this comment, has only rekindled that fear, and added to it.
I know it isn’t easy, as I have to check my mouth at the door, downstairs, every morning, until I can go down after she goes to bed. Basically that means from 7am to 10pm each word I say, has to be weighed, considered, all before being uttered. AND NO, IT IS NOT EASY TO DO, BUT IT MUST BE DONE.
LEST IT SHOULD BE, IF YOU TRULY CARE ABOUT THE PERSON YOU ARE LOOKING AFTER.