Archive for the ‘Holding It Together’ Category
I suppose it should be four egos, the dog sure as heck has one to match those of Mom, David, & myself. Seems it is a constant clash these days, and you know the juggling is becoming harder & harder.
I don’t know whose ego to massage anymore, sure as hell isn’t mine. It is always …
Another of those nights, where she claims to have seen someone in the backyard, flashing a light up into the window. Her imagination is getting good, but truth is, no one was in the backyard. At worse it was the idiot behind us, driving into his driveway and the headlights played across the window.
Still it …
There are times when I wonder, if I am just spinning my wheels, or merely going crazy. I mean, I want to do my best, and yet it seems like Mom isn’t willing to work with what we got. I mean we aren’t rich, I have to work from home, eke out a living from …
Read MoreThis whole caregiving job has no guidelines, no books that explain what you will go through, or how to adapt to the changes, to the frustrations. There is no magic course to take, that will teach you how to be a loving, compassionate, caregiver.
Either it is in you, or it isn’t.
You can talk and discuss …
Read MoreI think one of the main problems is the wearing down of one’s own patience, for normal things. It sounds wrong to say, but really, I find myself being impatient, at least in my own mind. I try to keep it level, to not show my impatience, but it seems to just get harder with …
Read MoreEvery day, every night, it happens.
I don’t know why, but it is almost as if her mind has wandered off somewhere, deep inside. It is hard to see, to cope with. I know, it is old age, and perhaps even signs of her mind slowly going. Could even be a sign of previous strokes, or …
We watched the movie called The Bucket List with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. I am glad I watched it, and also wish I never had. It has me wondering about a lot of things, none of which is exactly restful. I mean it is about two guys who are diagnosed with terminal cancer, given …
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Ever had those days, when nothing you do seems to please, or is enough?
I think this is one of them, in a growing long line of them, which makes me question, if I can survive this? I wonder too, how it impacts David, and yet I can’t dwell on that, or on how I feel …
Not one of my better mornings, but then, no morning is a good one, or so it seems on days like today. I don’t know, if it is me, mom, david, or what, but the fight to just survive seems to always be an uphill struggle. It’s hard to be motivated, to stay calm or …
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