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What Is There To Be Thankful For

  • Posted on October 10, 2010 at 9:55 am

It is the Canadian Thanksgiving weekend, and ya know, I wonder.  Just what is there to be thankful for?

I have a cold/flu for the last 2 weeks, every bone in my body aches, but I still have to get up at 7am and can’t head down to unwind until 10:30pm.

Dinner still has to be done, and the battle to make sure a 93 year old eats enough, is constant.

You may be sick, but you still have to be vigilant, to make sure that a 93 yr old takes all of her pills, not just the one’s she thinks she should. (Thanks to the buttinsky of a home support worker).

A wife who shows up and then disappears for most of the night, because he just can’t cope with the old person syndrome.  You know, the smells, the peculiarities, that old people seem to develop.

So what is there to be thankful for?

A routine that only changes when the health issues worsen?

A certainty that nothing you do, is going to prevent the final solution, the death of someone you love deeply.

A constant battle with Home Support Agencies that send workers who are, at best, there for the $20 an hour wage, not about making a difference in the lives of the people they come to help.  A so called ‘non profit’ agency that is really about only making money. A government whose sole purpose is to line their pockets, not serve the people who elect them.

Really, what is there to be thankful for?

For Life

Yeah, life sucks, I feel like shit, but bottom line is, I have a wife, who in his own way cares, and surprises me with his affection at times.  A mother who may be 93, but who is still able to recognize me, and talk to me. 

The ability to actually hold back the dark forces of greed, indifference, by being here for Mom, is something to be thankful for. It’s not easy, and yeah, when you are sick you still have to fight through it and do your job, because no one else will do it for you. And that does make you stronger, for when you are going to have to face your own demons, devils, called BEING ELDERLY.

Not much to be thankful for, or maybe a hell of a lot. I don’t know which it is, at times, but when it comes down to it, it is the life I have, and at least I am alive to experience it. I guess that too, is something to be thankful for.  The memories that can flood in, at just the right moment, that do, make this all worthwhile.

So Happy Thanksgiving, may it be one of many to come.

Annice Shaw Kovnats

  • Posted on July 4, 2009 at 7:56 pm

Annice at 92My mother was born in Canada, in the month of May, in the year 1917.

She was born to Rebecca Shaw in the town of Vegraville, Alberta. My grandfather ( Moshe Shaw ) was a sweet gentle man, who I wish I had gotten to know, however he passed away when I was just four years old.

My Grandmother, had leukemia and passed away in her early eighties. I miss her today, because she was such a sweet & kind person. Bubba Becky had four children, Manual, Solomon, Lilian, and Annice.

Mom was the youngest and is the only surviving child.

Mom married my father on January 21 1942. Now that is some time ago, and until dad died 7 years ago, they were always together, sharing everything. In fact, it  was a date that seemed almost magical to me, which is why David & I got married on that very same date. I mean they stuck together, in love with each other, for 61 years.

Sure they had their fights, but at the end, you could see that they still loved each other, just as if it was when they had first met. Though looking at them, I’d say their love was even greater, even after all those years together. Tough times they had, but it was their love for each other, that held them together, that made them truly a team.

Who knows, maybe their luck will pass on to us?

Mom is a quiet person. She rarely raised her voice, and yet, when she was angry, you knew it. She didn’t get that way often, least not so I remember, but when she did, she had this way about her, still does, that can bring a full boar charging rhino to its knees. She has a lot of courage, and yet, is truly a warm hearted person. She’s one of those types, that always looks for the good in a person, never accepting their badness.

It is hard for me to describe her, how she is, but there is a kind of strength that you can feel. Maybe not see it, but it is there, a sort of courage, that you can rely on when things are really bad. I know Dad often relied on her, for that, and I find, so do I. Maybe a bit less than I used to, but she is my rock.  At least now, I know what that phrase truly means.

I have an excellent example, in my mom.

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